Am I helping? Or am I adding to the misery?

I woke this morning feeling the profoundly deep sadness that has now become familiar to me. I am grieving for my daughter and there are days I miss her  so much I can barely walk.  Some days I sink into the feeling, allowing myself to give in to it.  Other times I drag myself out of the darkness and slowly start to put into practice all the strategies that I teach to my students and talk about on Happy stuff and fluff. I do that today and it works.  I start to feel better.

Then, I  make the mistake of checking Face-book.  It’s a mistake because my usually happy, inspirational newsfeed is filled with anger and vitriol.  People are angry at the government, angry at politicians and angry in general.

I understand that most of this is fuelled by fear and uncertainty.

Some of it is also fuelled by the certain knowledge that if ‘they’ were handling the current situation (Coronavirus) they would surely do a better job.  These comments are often peppered with unrepeatable expletives used to indulge in useless government bashing without actually offering viable solutions.

I am saddened for different reasons now.

Everyone at least in this country is allowed an opinion and I understand that people are angry.  I also recognize the value of social media/Facebook   I just wish people wouldn’t use it simply to spew out their anger all over newsfeeds.  It does not help anyone.

What it can do, is spread fear, spread anger and deepen the depression of the more vulnerable person who might just be reading it.

I am worried about Coronavirus too.  I am horrified at the deaths and concerned about the economy.  We are all frustrated by the situation.  So, tell me what you disagree with, offer better solutions.  Don’t hammer someone who believes differently to you. Be open to discussion. There could, indeed be a better way.

If you really feel so angry and frustrated about the way Coronavirus is being handled – write to your MP or political representative – they have to hear you. Complain in the right way to the right person who may actually be able to do something about it.   By name calling – government bashing and constantly complaining – you become part of the problem.  

The emphasis seems to have shifted to blame and who is at fault for lockdowns, rather than on those people actually suffering from Coronavirus.

You may have to stay indoors, you may have to take a pay cut, you may even lose your job – or your business. There is help available to help you with all of that.   And just so that you know, I have experienced all of those things at one time or another.  I completely understand the devastation.

However, I lost my mother, my sister and my daughter to cancer.  The thought of any one of them not having been able to access the treatment available to them because there was ‘no room at the inn.’   Is beyond human tolerance.

It is what it is – we are in lockdown – take all precautions, help where you can. Post on Facebook all day long but maybe ask yourself the question before you post –

‘Is this helping?’ or am I adding to the misery?

Interested to hear your polite thoughts in the comments.